Your Policy Is Null and Void Here

Note: This post was prompted by one of Goslyn’s.

Does anyone really like going to the dentist? In the area I live now, I seem to constantly encounter dental students – most of whom are men with young wives and small children. How do these relationships last? I would be terribly surprised if these poor wives LIKE visiting their dentist, even if he is their husband. And those poor kids! Lots of little scary Johnny Depp-type Willy Wonkas in the making.

But I digress. Although I’m sure these women and children probably still dislike going to the dentist, we’re here to talk about me. And I hate going to the dentist. Don’t misunderstand. I harbor no irrational fear of dentist chairs or loud noisy drills. I’m fine getting my teeth polished and having cavities filled. However, whenever I set foot in a dentist’s office something bad happens. This time it was money. And I don’t mess around with money, so I walked out before I even saw the dentist.

We’ve had really lousy or no dental insurance for several years now. Last year, when my husband got a real job (not the working-through-college kind), I was really excited to finally get good dental coverage. Sadly, that didn’t happen right away. But in January, his company switched dental insurance providers and things were looking up, until we actually saw our new dentist.

Alexander went first. They determined he had three cavities and gave him an estimate for over $300 to get said holes filled. Excuse me?! We have insurance! Good insurance! And that’s exactly who I called.

The nice customer service representative explained that the type of filling covered by our policy was different depending on whether they were filling front teeth or back molars. The “covered” types of fillings were paid for 100% by our insurance. (Now that’s more like it!) If we chose to go with the non-covered type of filling on our back molars, we would be responsible for paying for the difference. However, if the dentist didn’t offer the “covered” type of filling for our procedure, we could not be charge the “over” amount. (Sound’s good.)

So last Friday, it was my turn. The office is open from 8-5, but the latest appointment they make is 2:50. Explain that to me if you will. Because of this, Alexander had to take off work early to take care of the kids while I went to the dentist. Already, this was not an ideal situation. But since he had to go to the office to straighten out his filling misunderstanding anyway, we supposed it would all work out. We supposed wrong.

As I labored under a stack of “new patient” paperwork, Alexander spoke with the dentist: “I’m sorry. I refuse to do the “covered” type of filling in your case. What? You have to pay hundreds extra? Too bad.” I explained to Alexander that it didn’t matter. If the dentist refused to do the “covered” type of filling that made it unavailable. According to our insurance company, the dentist was not allowed to charge us the “over” amount if the “covered” filling was unavailable. We still wouldn’t have to pay for the fillings.

Properly encouraged, Alexander next spoke to a billing receptionist, while I continued my paperwork: “I’m sorry. We DO offer the “covered” type of filling, so even though the dentist refuses to use it in your case (thus making it unavailable to you), you’re responsible to pay the “over” amount. Your fair and equitable insurance policy is null and void here in we’re-trying-to-pay-off-our-college-debt-and-put-our-children-through- college-land.”

How can you argue with logic like that? I simply tore up my paperwork, returned my clipboard to the front desk and told them that I was canceling my appointment due to their ridiculous office policies. (They didn’t seem too concerned.) And we left the dentist office. In a bad mood, as usual.

Now I just hope I can get in to see our next random attempt at selecting a dentist before the baby’s due. After all, I have to select the dentist, make him my primary care dentist, wait a month to show up on their register, and then wait at least a month before they can see me. And hopefully not simply to tell me that my fair and equitable insurance policy is null and void in their office.

Did I mention I hate dentists?